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“I’ll stop with the sixth drink.” Or “What’s the use anyhow?”

From “Alcoholics Anonymous”, Page 24 (4th Edition), There Is A Solution: “When this sort of thinking is fully established in an individual with alcoholic tendencies, he has probably placed himself beyond human aid, and unless locked up, may die or go permanently insane. These stark and ugly facts have been confirmed by legions of alcoholics throughout history. But for the grace of God, there would have been thousands more convincing demonstrations.”

What To Do When Negative Thoughts Occur

1. Say to yourself, “Oh, there’s that thought again.”
2. Let it sit there and “float” over your right shoulder.
3. Don’t fight it (that which we resist, persists).
4. Let it just “be” there.
5. Don’t develop a feeling, emotion or action around it.
6. Go do something to help someone else.
7. Before you know it – it will have floated away.

1. Say to yourself, “Oh, there’s that thought again.”

When negative thinking occurs, we can’t stop it. We have no power over the thoughts that just happen. What we DO have power over is how we respond to those thoughts when they do occur. So, when negative thinking happens, be alert, awake and aware enough to be able to say, “Oh! There’s that thought again.”

2. Let it sit there and “float” over your right shoulder.

Think of that thought as sitting in a thought bubble and let it just float over your right shoulder. This may sound a little crazy, but if you can do this, it can put those negative thoughts into the right perspective to remind you that it is nothing more than a thought. We need to remember that just because we think it doesn’t mean it’s real.

3. Don’t fight it (that which we resist, persists).

Yes, that’s right – don’t fight it. Don’t beat yourself up for thinking it for the millionth time. Saying to yourself things like, “I shouldn’t be thinking this” or asking, “Why am I thinking this again?” is useless. You cannot control your thinking any more than you can control the digestion of your food or the circulation of your blood.

4. Let it just “be” there.

We alcoholics have a difficult time just lettings things “be.” We want to get in there and stir it up, force it to be a certain way, do it the way WE want it done. Just allowing it to be what it is (in this case, a thought that occurred) is a practice that will produce incredible dividends.

5. Don’t develop a feeling, emotion or action around it.

Here’s where the real work begins. If a negative thought occurs – my first action is to pause, take a breath, and then ask God to direct my thinking. If I can do this, I am NOT likely to develop a corresponding negative feeling, emotion, or action around that thought. The moment a negative thought occurs – that is the moment I need to just stop, breathe, and go to God.

6. Go do something to help someone else.

And the action continues. Our literature tells us that when I’m all parked up in the middle of my selfishness and self-centeredness, one of the best ways to get out of that is to focus my actions on helping someone else. Pick up the phone and call someone and ask them about THEIR day and find out if there is anything you can do to help THEM.

7. Before you know it – it will have floated away.

It’s truly amazing what happens when I stop thinking about me and “my sad little story.” When I can get out of myself long enough to think about how I might be useful to others (and to God), I find that my life ends up being filled with all I’ve ever wanted… peace and happiness.

In the Big Book, page 35 (4th Edition) it tells us, “So we shall describe some of the mental states that precede a relapse into drinking, for obviously this is the crux of the problem.” Our THINKING is the problem…. NOT alcohol. Our thinking tells us we can drink like a normal person and that it will be different this time.

And just 10 pages later in “We Agnostics,” it gives us the solution to said problem… “Lack of power, that was our dilemma. We had to find a power by which we could live, and it had to be a Power greater than ourselves. Obviously. But where and how were we to find this Power? Well, that’s exactly what this book is about. Its main object is to enable you to find a Power greater than yourself which will solve your problem.”

And if we’re that A.A. member who has a little time under our belts – we may find that our thinking is STILL the problem all these years later. Time in the Fellowship does not create immunity to negative thinking. If we’re taking the Steps, working a program of action and being useful to God and God’s kids… we have the tools to deal with the negative thoughts when they occur.

And here’s my experience of being 34 years sober… I realize the negative thinking never completely goes away. It DOES however, not come as often, and when it does come, it doesn’t stay as long. #exhale

1. Recognize the negative thought
2. Don’t take action on it
3. Pause, breathe, go to God
4. Go help someone else

In love & service,